HEAD BLOG

I don’t cook on Christmas Day. Unlike most people, my day tends to be devoid of anything more festive than a piece of toast leaving me free to visit family without trying to cram in a five course meal at the same time. As a result, I cook a meal on Christmas Eve and then again on Boxing Day.

Now, given that I have no photos of my most marvellous pheasant meal (for Boxing Day), I’ll just hand over the duck I cooked instead. It was quite tasty. Even if it was overcooked.

You will need:

Duck
Potatoes
Carrots
Porcini mushrooms
Red wine
Beef stock
Onion
Five spice
Ginger
Seasoning for potatoes
Goose fat

Par boil the potatoes and heat the fat.

Put potatoes in to roast and par boil the carrots. Add them to the roasting tray.

Soak the porcini mushrooms for 30 mins. After ten mins begin to cook the duck by searing quickly and then placing in the oven for 20 mins.

Fry onion and add some five spice and ginger and a dash of orange.
Pour red wine and stock in and reduce to sticky consistency.

After the hour is up, plate the roast potatoes, carrots and carved duck. Add the porcini mushrooms on top and spoon over the sauce.

Christmas without mince pies is like Cannon without Ball, Paul without Debbie – it just doesn’t work. You could always pop down the supermarket and buy in your mincers but where’s the fun in that?! The recipe below, spotted in a Sainsbury’s magazine and tweaked ever so slightly, is supposed to make 24 mince pies – trust me, whilst the pastry is enough for 24 the mince meat will probably make in excess of 36! It’s also worth bearing in mind they calculate the 24 based on cutter sizes of 7.5cm and 6cm. So stick on some cheesey Christmas music, pour yourself some booze and get stuck in…

Brown Sugar Pastry
350g Plain flour
75g Brown sugar
125g Cold butter, diced
1 Large egg yolk
Vanilla extract

Begin by preheating the oven to 200˚, fan 180˚, gas mark 6.

Now, sift the flour into your mixing bowl and add in the brown sugar.

Next rub in the butter until the mixture resembles breadcrumbs.

Making a well in the centre, add the egg yolk, a few drops of vanilla extract and 4-5 tablespoons of cold water.

Now for the messy bit, get your hands in there and start to combine the ingredients until they form a soft dough.

Tip it out onto a lightly floured work top and knead briefly until the dough becomes smooth.

Divide your pastry up into 2 or 3 smaller balls, wrap them in cling-film and place in the fridge to chill for 30 minutes.

Whilst waiting for the pastry to chill it’s time to make the mincemeat.

Mincemeat
25g Blanched almonds
50g Ready-to-eat Dried figs
50g Ready-to-eat Stoned dates
50g Ready-to-eat Pitted prunes
50g Dried cranberries
50g Cut mixed peel
50g Regular or Vegetarian suet
1/2 tsp Ground mixed spice
1/2 tsp Ground cinnamon
Grated zest & juice of 1 tangerine
75g Dark soft brown sugar
1 Small Bramley cooking apple, unpeeled & grated (and it really does need to be small!)
2 tbsp Dark rum or Brandy (or Whisky or Orange Liqueur or any other alcohol really, not sure why they only suggest those two)
Demerara sugar for sprinkling

For some reason when you say to most people why don’t you make your own mincemeat they give you a look of both mild contemplation and utter despair, usually responding with “Oh it takes far too long” or “It’s too much faffing and arsing about, you might as well buy it”. Now, it may come as a surprise to learn that from weighing out the ingredients to spooning it into your pastry it will take you around 15 minutes. Yes. 15 whole minutes. Ages isn’t it? Admittedly it may work out costing a little more than buying a jar readymade but I can guarantee it will taste a whole lot better!

Firstly if your almonds aren’t already, blanch them by covering with boiling water for no more than 1 minute. Drain off the hot water and immediately rinse with cold water. Drain again and pat dry to remove excess water. Now holding the almonds between your thumb and index finger, squeeze gently and the skins should slip off.

Put the blanched almonds, figs, dates, prunes and depending on their size, cranberries into a food processor and pulse until roughly chopped.

Transfer to a mixing bowl and add in the remaining ingredients stirring until well mixed.

At this point the recipe states to add 2 tablespoons of your alcohol, personally I felt this was woefully inadequate, you could barely taste the brandy in the first batch I made. If you follow my lead you will stir in a good 4 tablespoons (more if you are so inclined) and leave the mix to stand whilst you turn your attention back to the pastry.

Having chilled for 30 minutes remove your pastry from the fridge.

Lightly flour your work surface and roll the pastry out thinly.

Using the larger cutter, cut out 24 pie bases and push them into your bun trays.

Add a spoonful of your mincemeat, careful not to add too much as it will bubble over.

Roll out the remaining pastry and cut out the 24 tops with the smaller cutter.

Brush the underside of each top with milk and place on each pie, pinching the edges together to seal them.

Brush your pies with milk, sprinkle generously with demerara sugar and make 2 small cuts in the centre with a knife.

Lastly, bake in your preheated oven for 20-25 minutes.

The best thing about making your own mincemeat is that if you make too much simply put it in an airtight jar and store it in a cool dry place until next year. Alternatively, festively label and decorate your jars and give them out as stocking fillers!

Time for a nice warm mince pie, smothered in cream – enjoy.

The results of a two month research programme, during which life, limb and tooth were sacrificed for the greater good, are finally in. 25 varieties tasted and tested and a whole lot of debate, argument and violence went into the final decision.

There were rules. Of a sort. We had to test the pie, not drown it in a sea of cream, custard or whisky. It had to be served cold, on its own – not wrapped up in anything fancy or placed in the mouth by a beautiful man or woman. These pies, in other words, had to be good on their own. Everyone had their own criteria (and that’s something we’ll work on for next year) so for some it was a matter of whether they could taste the booze (thanks Jeni) or whether they gave good recourse to the Rennie pills (thanks Dave). Some wanted a specific sensation for the pastry whilst others just wanted a good all-rounder.

Strangely enough, I was the only person to taste 99% of the pies. But my opinion didn’t carry any more weight.

Although in the end, I did.

Enough of pre-snack speech. On with the results. In reverse order:

20. JOINT Cake Collection (Netto) & Cake Collection Iced (Netto)
19. CO-OP
18. Marks and Spencer Luxury All Butter
17. Aldi Specially Selected
16. Marks and Spencer Lattice
15. Sainsburys
14. Mr. Kipling
13. JOINT Walkers Glenfiddich & Tesco Deep Filled
12. Aldi Holly Lane
11. Mayall / Birds Rustic Mince coins
10. Booths All Butter
9. Marks and Spencer Deep Filled
8. JOINT CO-OP Luxury & Sainsburys Taste the Difference
7. Marks and Spencer Connoisseur
6. Booths Minis
5. Costco
4. Asda All Butter
3. Greggs
2. Tesco finest
1. Buckley’s Uppermill (Carl’s local bakery)

And there you have it. Very pleased that a local baker won out. Very sorry to see my own baking attempt slide off the bottom scale.

Until next year

My idea of heaven is quite basic. Requiring only a tatty old 3′x2′ wooden board from my childhood (the ‘drawing board’), a pile of clean, untouched paper, and a freshly sharpened pencil. The possibilities are endless. The very definition of a blank canvas. That’s my heaven. Read more…